Wednesday, June 30, 2010

My feet hurt. My feet have always hurt, they have never been very cooperative feet, but lately they hurt all day, every day and worse. No matter what shoes I wear, (Or don't wear) or whatever else, my feet hurt all the time and it makes the simplest things in the day a chore. But I am trying to look at the occurrences in my life differently, rather than circumstances to fuss against, or as a punishment from God for one thing or another, I'm trying to see them as something that comes directly from Him and I'm trying to ask and understand from Him what I am to do with it all. And I pray and I think and I look around and all I can come up with is that I am done with housework. Is that a horrible thing to say? I've done it for 20 years now, I've got big kids all around me and I just can't keep up with it anymore. Even putting all the laundry away seems like this big mountain and it is simply because every step I take... HURTS.

I don't know what else to do. I have always been a walker and I've never minded caring for the family. Housework has never been something I would complain about, I don't mind cleaning the kitchen or sweeping. Rand has always tried to get me to give more over to the kids and I have just had a hard time doing it. I just like feeling like this is my house, you know? But I just can't deny it, Shayleen is going to have to take over and get the others working and I am just not going to be the one that can be the main player... Argh.

So what am I going to do? Well, schoolwork, obviously. That is a good portion of the day. But also, I think I am going to draw. I don't have any real talent, I can't organize, I can't garden, I can't do anything really very useful. It seems like the only natural skill God had placed in me is to be able to draw pretty pictures. Not very useful, but I guess that's what I will do. Read the Hobbit to my boys (and drag them through their math) and draw pretty pictures. Hows that for retirement plans?

3 comments:

  1. Aha, thou art so wrong my friend. You are the main player and always will be the main player. You just dont know that! :) But if you retire to your chair you will quickly see what a player you really are! Your days will not only be spent schooling the younguns but you will be continually sought out for your wisdom - you will still be playing Solomon. Your advice in cooking will still be needed. Your expertise in cleaning will be in demand. You will still need to teach young fingers to sew. Yes, yes, dear friend, never fear..you will still be the main player!

    Now about those feet..it may not be that the pain will last forever. I had incredible pain in my feet that lasted for over a year. I was barely limping. Now for some odd unknown reason it just disappeared. Did the tendons relax? I dont know but it is gone except for on days when I am on my feet all day. On those days my feet kill me and my legs throb like every vein holds a clot, I kid you not! The doctor says its a circulation problem. Could that be the problem with your feet?

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  2. I don't know. I feel like all the bones are in the wrong place. It just bums me out.

    Thanks for the encouragement.

    Love you.

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  3. Kerri~
    I was reading through some of your posts and wanted to comment on a few but it's late...so just quick on this one.
    My feet have had pain connected with my hips and alignment, etc. 3 years ago in fact my legs went numb and I could barely move. my chiropractor recommended Brooks tennis shoes and I kid you not the first time I tried a pair on (not at the chiro, at a store, because I was leary of a gimmick...and then bought the same pair for almost half on Amazon, because I am frugal like that.) it felt like I was walking on clouds. They were amazing. My second pair weren't as amazing, but I didn't realize they have different shoes for the way people's feet are (duh!) Anyway, not trying to sell something, but if it helps you I wanted to share.

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